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Writer's pictureErin Harrison

Just as Valid as Our Fear

Updated: Sep 9, 2020

“Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy.”

-Anne Frank

I have been posting on social media more regularly these days, though not nearly enough. There are so many people scrolling on their couch, attempting to buffer, maybe seeking hope.

To attempt to fully grasp the suffering across our world is to open ourselves to immense emotions that quickly become overwhelming. Someone recently and accurately commented on how dangerous it is to be an empath these days. I often use analogies in my sessions; this feels as if one is standing on a cliff watching the devastation below, and the thought spirals seem to be alternately torn between running in safe directions and leaping headfirst into the chaos.

So, I will be transparent, which is really all one can do when the world feels upside down. I, along with everyone I know, is on that precipice; torn between hiding under the covers and pretending all is fine, while also leaping into news articles and worry for those we love- losing their livelihoods or worse, their lives. I feel it too.

Maybe it’s a good idea for people to listen to their own advice… I know, I know.

So, this is when we use our skills. This is why we build our strength. In any given situation, we can find skills that are useful that we’ve used before. This is a novel virus, but we are not new to adversity and overwhelm. Now is when we utilize the practices we have been building together.

In the school where I have worked, there is a therapeutic de-escalation room. On the door there is a drawing of a thermometer. It’s titled, “The size of your reaction should reflect the size of your problem”. I now believe that there should be another step. When the issue is big, so can be our response, but it doesn’t have to automatically translate to panic – instead it can reflect the level of empathy and thought management we need to apply, to ourselves or others.

The fear of this moment is real and valid, it is also contagious. With conscious and intentional thinking, and returning to my breath, I am practicing daily gratitude and awareness of little joys. Through that, I have been able to recognize the fears that are real, and differentiate those that can be dismissed, in order to give energy to what I can control.

Remember, gratitude cannot be haphazardly slapped on, in a way meant to invalidate the reality of our existence, it is meant to aid in our mindset and perspective shift. As scary as reality may be, it’s often a breeze compared to the worst-case scenario we have developed in our mind.

How we each respond to this crisis should feel authentic and thoughtful; and there’s no rule book for this.

We can always recognize the joys around us. We can sit and feel the sunshine on our face rather than read that next news article. We can recognize this extra time with those we love and live in those moments, for those are just as valid as our fear.

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